Rookie Mistake pt. 3

A Movie Myron Sketch

by Timothy Meinke

Myron………………………………...................Rookie usher

Marvin………………………………..................Senior usher

Jason Schall………………………………..........The lord of the fries

The Lord of the Fries

MOVIE THEATRE. MARVIN AND MYRON STAND FACING THE CAMERA IN THEIR TRADEMARK COSTUMES.

MARVIN

And now, "Mediocre Moments in Movies;" by Myron. (INDICATES MYRON AND STEPS ASIDE.)

MYRON

"The Lord of the Fries."

JASON ENTERS ONSCREEN WEARING A BICARDI CAP AND CARRYING A BOX OF FRENCH FRIES. HE BABBLES ABOUT HOW MUCH HE LOVES FRENCH FRIES, HOW EVERY MOVIE THEATRE SHOULD HAVE A FRY-MAKING MACHINE AND HOW HE WOULD PATRONIZE OR WORK AT ANY THEATRE THAT HAS ONE. A SHEPHERD’S CROOK PULLS HIM OFF-SCREEN. MARVIN CHUCKLES AND CLAPS MYRON’S BACK.

MARVIN

Rookie! That’s "The Lord of the FLIES!"

MYRON

"The Lord of the Flies?"

MARVIN

Yep!

MYRON

(CRESTFALLEN.) Oh. I thought it was fries.

MARVIN

Easy mistake to make. Hey, you know what? I’m hungry all of a sudden.

MYRON

(POINTS IN JASON’S DIRECTION.) You want some fries?

MARVIN

No. Let’s go out to the dumpster and get some maggots.

MYRON

(GAGS.) No! (STARTS WHEEZING.) Dumpsters- (WHEEZES.) Bad for my asthma!

MARVIN

(THROW-AWAY LINE.) Sucks to your ass-mar! Come on!

MARVIN PUSHES MYRON OFF-SCREEN. JASON FOLLOWS THEM.

JASON

Given any more thought to a French fry machine in the snack bar?

The End